Running with my brother and listening to his thought processes on running is an awful lot like having a mirror held up in front of me.  He has a similar breathing technique, the same arm pumping action and the same mental battle to overcome self-doubt and laziness on a run.  When he had been running regularly for about 3 months he asked me “Do you spend a lot of time telling yourself you are running whilst you are running?” – I was shocked.  Yes! – When I first started it was like that all the time – if I thought much of anything beyond my next breath it was always variations of ‘am I doing this? Why am I doing this? I can’t do this – but I am definitely doing this’.

We ran the Ikano Robin Hood Half Marathon together on the 27^th of September (his first, my third) and it was one of those beautiful surreal moments when you look at someone and can completely empathise.  Oh, I have been there my brother, but know this – pain is only temporary whilst the glory is forever.    For my part, I am not sure I was much good as a companion, but after leaving Kyle behind in the Krakow ParkRun I was going to stick to him like glue the whole way round – whether he wanted or needed me there or not.

I should point out – this was only 3 weeks before the Lisbon Marathon – and so it was supposed to be my last big run (i.e. 20 miles).  So I was half planning to run 10 K before the half started to make up the distance.  I was put off committing to this plan for a number of reasons. First, Kyle isn’t that slow or that far behind me in terms of training that I could expect to keep up with him if I ran 10 K first!  Second, running before requires somewhere to run and getting there like an hour and a half early and we know how well mornings generally work for me!  Thirdly, that weekend I was struck down by some horrible virus that made it difficult to breathe and swallow so even running the half was probably pushing it!  But run it I did and I can’t believe I can even say this – the whole thing was phenomenally easy.

Hence why I am not sure how good a companion I was for Kyle.  For example; as Kyle paced himself I was itching to go faster.  As Kyle dragged himself along the 8^th mile I was practically skipping.  As Kyle extended his middle finger to the 9^th mile marker I giggled and clamped a sympathetic hand on his shoulder before adding conspiratorially “Wait until mile 10, that’s when the real pain starts”.  Because I had passed through that particular level of Hell myself hadn’t I?  Back in June with the Liverpool Half Marathon.

I tried to help – sharing running mantras I had learnt, chatting about the weather but on the final mile, when Kyle’s emotions were flicking frantically between the euphoria of nearly finishing with the awful knowledge that you have. Not. Finished. Yet. And-why-do-my-legs-hurt-so-gosh-darn-much? I was powerless to help.  I had exhausted my running tips and/or distracting stories.  And anyway – I knew that particular set of emotions flashing across Kyle face.  Towards the end of my first half marathon I had sobbed aloud each time someone with a “in memory of” t-shirt slipped by and I nearly had a breakdown when a blind runner overtook me.  How wonderful – I’d thought – isn’t the world a fantastic and yet terrible place?  And Kyle was in that place now.  Pushed himself beyond what he thought he was physically capable of.  Pushed beyond anything.  But still doing it – yep, definitely doing it.

For my part I was hugely impressed.  Kyle was a machine.  He did not stop once.  Not to sip his drink.  Not to chat to friends.  Not to go to the loo.  And he ran faster up hills (he trained in Sheffield which is apparently hilly).  Just kept going.  Steady.  Determined.  And I utterly respect that.  When he crossed that finish line you could see what it meant to him – the amalgamation of months of training, completing a goal that seemed outlandish 6 months ago, realising that you are actually capable of so much more than you ever thought possible.  Yeah, respect bro.  I am honoured that I got to witness it!

Week 13: Total Run Distance: 33 K (20 miles). Total Running Time 4:06